Comments : 39

Good morning, hope you are off to having a wonderful weekend. We were invited to someones house for dinner last night. it is only the second invitation I have accepted to go out and socialize like that. It was very nice to go, but I still feel like I am under a dark cloud most days. I am trying to push myself with baby steps to do things I have not really done since my mom’s passing, but I am mindful that it takes time, I am on no one’s timetable and there is a process to be played out.

Anyway, getting off my soapbox, and sharing a few of my dads recent emails….I find almost all of them so interesting. Here are two that should give you a laugh with a little bit of history about singing our National Anthem during sporting events.  Hope you enjoy too! Dad, take it away….

_____________________________________________________________

This is distressingly accurate.
Men Are Just Happier People……

What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Two pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25 minutes. No wonder men are happier.  

OFFSPRING

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

    NICKNAMES

    If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

   
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman.


   EATING OUT

   When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will     actually admit they want change back.

    When the girls get their bill, outcome the pocket calculators. 
    BATHROOMS

     A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.

   The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

 
    ARGUMENTS

    A woman has the last word in any argument.

   Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument
                                 FUTURE
                               A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

                              A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
MARRIAGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.


DRESSING UP

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
NATURAL

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

A married man should forget his mistakes. There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing!

SO, send this to the women who have a sense of humor…. and to the men who will enjoy reading.
________________________________________________

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Well those sure gave me a laugh and are a good way to start the day. Hope you enjoyed them too! I want to wish everyone a fabulous day, hope the sun is shining and its not too cold! Here, still not a flake of snow, but I am patiently waiting:) Until next time…..

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Thank you for these thoughtful posts! Since my mom died several years ago, I spend almost every Saturday with my dad and your thoughts , posts help when I’m tired etc
Thank you

Tina I love both of these posts from your dad – tell him he put a smile on many faces today! 😉

Hilarious with elements of truth. Thanks for a good read with a good laugh. My best to you and your father..

Tina, I really enjoyed your Dad’s e-mail today. Very timely comments about having lunch, the difference between male and female when the check arrives. Having lunch with a friend today and trying to think of a polite way to ask for separate checks.
I find having separate checks is much easier and you have the freedom to order what ever you want and leave a tip
that you feel comfortable with.

Just so true and so cute. I’m sending to my husband ,son , and daughter !! Thanks for sharing.

Your mom picked a real winner and you are so lucky he is your dad! This is the most I have laughed in months, no, maybe years!! No one seems to have a sense of humor anymore so please do me a favor and thank him for me, for this and keep them coming!

Read these out loud as my husband and I are on our way to dinner and he shouted Spot on! Thanks, needed some humor. Love the French planters and your flowers are great!

Thank you!
I remember, many years ago, when I was an high school cheerleader, I loved that even though we were cheering for different teams, during the National Anthem we were all united as one nation under God.

Loved this. Having been married 55 years I can relate. My husband just passed away, and this brought a much needed smile to me. Thank you so much.

Thanks, Tina, for sharing your precious Dad with us! I love reading your Dad’s emails! Hope you have a great week. So nice to hear that you are getting out for dinner with friends. Keeping you and your Dad in my prayers.

Dear Tina, That is so adorable of you to put your mother’s photo here. I know how much you all must miss her. She was an incredible loving and fabulous lady.. My sincere condoleances to you, your father and all your family. The hardest thing in life is to lose one’s mother and somehow we seem to carry on. Only time will heal your pain..
Sending my sincere wishes for you to turn everything into positive, uplifting plans for you and your family. 💙🙏🏼
Much affection, Melissa

Oh how I’m enjoying your dad’s emails! He’s got to be a great guy also. This one is extra funny and so very true!!

Hilarious !! Send your dad my hugs !!
One day everything will be ok again. Hugs to you.

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