Hi friends! Back with another Let’s Talk episode—and let me tell you, there are so many things swirling in my head lately, I might just have enough material to carry us through the rest of the year, haha. Occasionally I like to switch things up and post at night, hence this 7pm post. Surprisingly these seem to get a lot of traffic. Here we go….
Today’s topic is something oddly specific to how I operate. I’m genuinely curious—does anyone else do this? When it comes time to get ready for something big—like a formal event, wedding, or fancy dinner—I tend to leave everything (in terms of wardrobe only) to the very last minute. I don’t know why I do it, because it almost always sends me into a mini tailspin. And yet…I continue. It’s like part of me thrives on the pressure. I secretly think I enjoy the challenge (although my blood pressure might eventually argue).
Case in point: this weekend we have a wedding and a formal dinner. I thought I had my outfits ready to go… until I realized two of the dresses I wanted to wear were packed away in storage boxes. And when did I realize this? Three days before the events. Naturally.
Off I went into the city, frantically shopping for a backup dress. I found one—yay—but it needed a small alteration. Did I take it to the tailor immediately? Of course not. I waited until the day before. Thankfully, my saint of a tailor squeezed me in, and now I’ll be picking up the dress the morning of the event. Classic. In the meantime I also ordered 3 dresses online, given the sad inventory in stores, this is I am learning fast, a much easier route. Easy enough to return what doesn’t work.
Then came the shoes. I assumed something in my closet would work. Wrong. So yes, I was out hunting for the perfect pair 24 hours before I need them. I overnighted a pair and they’ll probably arrive two hours before we need to leave. Because…it seems that’s the way I do things.
This kind of eleventh-hour scramble isn’t new for me. My mom used to laugh at my antics. I’ll never forget an engagement party we were going to years ago—I had the most stunning black lace dress with a big statement flower at the waist. Minutes before we had to leave, I realized I had misplaced the flower. Total panic. I frantically rummaged through my drawer where I kept those kinds of things and found a pink flower pin (clashed terribly), ran to my garage with flower in hand, grabbed a can of black spray paint, and gave it a makeover. Problem solved in 20 seconds—and no one ever knew the difference.
Now here’s the ironic part.
When it comes to packing for a trip, or planning for a party, no matter how small or large, I’m the complete opposite. I actually start days in advance—laying things out, packing a little each day, and making lists upon lists. By the time we leave, I’m mostly packed with just a few last-minute things to toss in. And for any kind of party, I am fully ready days ahead of time. It’s the one area where I somehow manage to be a planner with time to spare. Go figure.
So yes, while I do understand the joy of having everything ready ahead of time, and have even pulled that off a few times, there’s something about the last-minute scramble that I weirdly seem to invite, I don’t quite understand why though!
Everything is now in place (fingers crossed for those shoes), and I did a dress rehearsal today that made me feel very confident about the whole look. Phew!
So tell me—does anyone else operate like this? Or am I the only one living in a permanent episode of being in frazzled fashion state until everything falls into place?
PS Irony of “the dress” for the wedding is that after ordering 3 dresses online and buying one in person, I ended up finding a dress I wore to a wedding in Montreal at least 14 years ago (in one of the many boxes we have stored in a closet), put it on,it fit like a glove and I think I am actually going to wear it! Good thing, though I ordered those shoes:)
And that’s whats on my mind this Thursday. Will be so curious to see if anyone can relate. Thanks for stopping in, wishing you a wonderful evening! Until next time…
Some people do better under pressure. It could be you know you have to make a decision and get it done last minute, so your brain tells you “no more hesitating” – and it gets done! (Does that make sense)? Like you subconsciously know this is it, time to get ‘it’ done and/or make a decision, no more fiddle/faddle lol. I tend to do this myself.
I am a planner of wardrobes because I traveled in my work for 22 years and didn’t have the luxury of time “to scramble” when I was home.
In reading your description of how you operate … You obviously procrastinate because you are either an emotional dresser.. “I want to see how I feel the day before the event and then I’ll choose” … or like so many women of our generation we think ; “I might be able to lose 5-7 pounds by then and fit into that terrific dress I wore 14 years ago” 🙂 Good on you! That’s my target by the end of the yer… and I am well on my way… to leaving behind far more than 5-7 pounds!
I do not do what you describe; I maybe do not see the “stakes” as that high. My guess is you could have worn any number of beautiful dresses in your closet and looked great/nobody would have gone home saying,”what was Tina thinking with that dress?” Ha! I tend to believe we should all relax more with our clothes, and wear what we want and feel good in. I personally wouldn’t wear brand new shoes to an event like that, because if they deliver blisters or other ‘new shoe’ problems, then you’re stuck in pain or whatever not-good alternative presents itself. I want to both enjoy myself and be comfortable.
Also, I wonder if the frenzy around outfit/accessories is part of the whole experience for you? Like getting everything just right in terms of presentation or whatever is part of the thrill of a big event? just a thought…..
oh my goodness, I can so relate. I’m a retired florist and for more years than I care to number I lived with the panic induced by a product that was perishable and could only be ordered and designed a few days before important and special events. The frenzy and chaos were incredible. I lived on adrenaline and caffeine in the days before an event and slept only when it was done. Then…. my youngest son was getting married and asked me to do the florals and event design. I was honored and worked to make it my best production ever. I forgot one thing….. as the mother of the groom I needed a beautiful gown as well as all the accessories and shoes. Thank goodness for a local boutique owner who took me under her wing and made sure ked fabulous and felt confident and perfectly styled
You had me laughing. I am somewhat like you. I do tend to wait until the last minute. I have a feeling you have a closet full of beautiful things so you know worst case scenario you have some great backups. That is the case with me, I LOVE clothes and fashion and have a closet o prove it. Turned my sons old bedroom into my dream closet. So even though I like to go through the process of planning out outfits from dresses to jewelry to shoes, etc…and often times might want to buy something new to change things up, I tend to do it late because I guess I know worst case- I have beautiful back up choices. That’s my educated guess. And clearly from the few pictures I have seen of you, you have great style so I bet you have many beautiful things to choose from. Hope your shoes turn up and hope your events are/were lots of fun! Love these posts too.
You are like me, I do well under pressure and in fact, might even do my “best work” under pressure! I have always been that way, ever since way back to high school, cramming then onto college and graduate school. I thrived on the surge of adrenaline I would get from waiting till last. minute. Only thing I do ahead of time (like you) is pack days in advance as I want to be covered and not have to worry about going out in a foreign country to buy something i may have forgotten. You are probably type A as well. The point is it sounds like it always works out!
I work best under pressure but don’t like to. Because of working under pressure I’m totally exhausted and don’t eat until next day and can’t sleep at night. I have high anxiety and it’s NOT good! I’ve been told by drs and cardiologist I’m asking for a heart attack or stroke. Drs say your body has to vent from pressure…..well my body did and I almost died! I’m saying this to try to help you and not ruin your health. My life is different now.
Your escapades on doing things last minute would drive me crazy lol lol I am one of those really bad Type AAA’s that always do things way in advance. My organized mind is vastly over organized lol lol But it does seem to work well for you so whatever!!!!! Different strokes for different f0lks lol I do know whatever you do it turns out beautifully!!!!1
Being home to sort out something is different from traveling, Having options in our closets is huge and actually fun to go through different outfits.
Just enjoy however things come together, It isn’t a reflection of anything.
We are so lucky to be able to create a look for any occasion and just embrace how fabulous it all comes together!
Clothing seems to be an afterthought when I have been putting together a party. Last minute I have a meltdown because I’m thinking I can’t wear that outfit. I think didn’t wear that the last time most of us were together. So off I go shopping for a new attire. I can certainly relate to your last minute shopping.
You gave me a good laugh at your spray painting the flower story- brilliant! I have a lot of formal clothes (used to do a lot of entertaining 2-4 times a week with my husbands law firm) so I. know I always have fallbacks. But every time I dress up, I do often like to add something “new”. Could be a pair of shoes or maybe a piece of jewelry or bag.
However I now almost always order everything online because the stores are so poorly stocked. I have been known to put things off to the end as well, I think mostly because I. know if all else fails, I definitely have something in my closet that will more than make do. So yes, relatable in many ways! Enjoy your events!
If I have something and I love it and know I really want to wear it, then I can plan in advance and leave it at that. (Now making sure it is pressed or steamed….I may wait some on that.) On the other hand, if I do not feel confident about what I have on hand, I tend to either shop early or fret like anything and delay. This is not good for me because I tend to settle and not like what I find. What I have learned is that I now have two or three dress styles I really like and feel good in. That narrows my search considerably and allows me to search quickly. I can leave trends and unflattering styles behind. I tend to have fun with shoes and handbags.
Nancy B makes the most important observation. I do the same thing and was told what I am really doing is drag racing my heart. All that intense stress is really hard on your body.
I used to run large galas with A list attendees Everything had to run perfectly – no room for any issues.
If there were they were handled so no one ever knew. The toll each event took was total exhaustion and I would physically collapse in the days following. While exciting and millions of dollars raised – it was a high price to pay.
As we age, we gain wisdom
Not everything matters as much as we think is does. Your health is so much more important.
I plan weeks ahead of time, I try on every possibility WITH shoes, and I like to have nailed down at least 2 complete outfits so I have a choice when the time comes.
I have also ordered new stuff if I am not completely happy with what I already have. I don’t do well with last minute gambles or time pressures.
As for important longer travel (3 wks in Italy) I start at least a month in advance. I have a large plastic bin labeled “Italy” and put in everything I think would be useful to have. Then when I actually pack, I may edit and leave something behind but I won’t be scrambling. Not 100% effective but it puts my mind at ease. Unfortunately, my husband is a complete opposite so we pack our own things and seldom “comingle”.
Interesting concept about fashion! Not me at all! I plan months in advance with an additional option 2 as a backup. Being in the New England area you never know how the weather may turn. I usually have one dress with sleeves and one without.
If by chance I come upon a party dress that fits and looks good I buy it in anticipation that an event will pop up. I am lucky enough to have an everyday closet and a dress up closet. Sometimes I go and take a look in there and surprise myself!
I am definitely a planner….Especially if we are going somewhere via plane and I have to pack everything. But I do have some standards that I tend to pull for the local “dressed up more than usual” events.
I do rely on my rolling rack to prep for travel and can easily add what I need as it crosses my mind.
I LOVE these discussion topics of late…please keep it up…my home is well decorated & has plenty of seasonal decor…so love the opportunity to comment with like minded readers. Your description is so ‘on-point’ for me…especially when it comes to in-home events or travel. Super organized…if the departure or event date was moved up closer, I’d be ready……but with regard to having to attend a ‘one-off’ event…be it a wedding, fund raiser, dinner…I used to be like you…but my reasoning was….I never knew what size I may be as my weight fluctuated by some 30 pounds…did I ‘enjoy’ (read over-eat) summer too much, did I get back to a workout routine or did something totally frustrate me that I consoled myself with comfort food or did I get my anger out by detail cleaning….So I could never pick out one-off clothing in advance….I Had to be last minute….now, fast forward 20 years post gainfully employed working…and my wardrobe has slowly become so perfect that you could text me that King Charles had a vacant seat for dinner and I’d have the proper attire. I have time to exercise everyday, no emergency communications from my kids needing this or that, and we eat our largest meal around 1-1:30, salads/soups for dinner….so much healthier that I’ve been maintaining my weight w/in 5-7 pounds. I think that part of the last minute ensemble choice also has to do with comfort…especially pre/post menopausal…..and thank heavens your joining what the younger set has been doing for many years….we ordered about 10 different sneaker for each kid to see what they wanted and returned the rest….with a usual 90 day return window, we always ordered early and held on to them to see which one’s they really wanted once school started. Crazy system but totally doable…now you can even get things w/in hours…Thanks for your post! Hope you enjoy the event!
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Hi friends! Back with another Let’s Talk episode—and let me tell you, there are so many things swirling in my head lately, I might just have enough material to carry us through the rest of the year, haha. Occasionally I like to switch things up and post at night, hence this 7pm post. Surprisingly these seem to get a lot of traffic. Here we go….
_____________________________________________________________
Today’s topic is something oddly specific to how I operate. I’m genuinely curious—does anyone else do this? When it comes time to get ready for something big—like a formal event, wedding, or fancy dinner—I tend to leave everything (in terms of wardrobe only) to the very last minute. I don’t know why I do it, because it almost always sends me into a mini tailspin. And yet…I continue. It’s like part of me thrives on the pressure. I secretly think I enjoy the challenge (although my blood pressure might eventually argue).
Case in point: this weekend we have a wedding and a formal dinner. I thought I had my outfits ready to go… until I realized two of the dresses I wanted to wear were packed away in storage boxes. And when did I realize this? Three days before the events. Naturally.
Off I went into the city, frantically shopping for a backup dress. I found one—yay—but it needed a small alteration. Did I take it to the tailor immediately? Of course not. I waited until the day before. Thankfully, my saint of a tailor squeezed me in, and now I’ll be picking up the dress the morning of the event. Classic. In the meantime I also ordered 3 dresses online, given the sad inventory in stores, this is I am learning fast, a much easier route. Easy enough to return what doesn’t work.
Then came the shoes. I assumed something in my closet would work. Wrong. So yes, I was out hunting for the perfect pair 24 hours before I need them. I overnighted a pair and they’ll probably arrive two hours before we need to leave. Because…it seems that’s the way I do things.
This kind of eleventh-hour scramble isn’t new for me. My mom used to laugh at my antics. I’ll never forget an engagement party we were going to years ago—I had the most stunning black lace dress with a big statement flower at the waist. Minutes before we had to leave, I realized I had misplaced the flower. Total panic. I frantically rummaged through my drawer where I kept those kinds of things and found a pink flower pin (clashed terribly), ran to my garage with flower in hand, grabbed a can of black spray paint, and gave it a makeover. Problem solved in 20 seconds—and no one ever knew the difference.
Now here’s the ironic part.
When it comes to packing for a trip, or planning for a party, no matter how small or large, I’m the complete opposite. I actually start days in advance—laying things out, packing a little each day, and making lists upon lists. By the time we leave, I’m mostly packed with just a few last-minute things to toss in. And for any kind of party, I am fully ready days ahead of time. It’s the one area where I somehow manage to be a planner with time to spare. Go figure.
So yes, while I do understand the joy of having everything ready ahead of time, and have even pulled that off a few times, there’s something about the last-minute scramble that I weirdly seem to invite, I don’t quite understand why though!
Everything is now in place (fingers crossed for those shoes), and I did a dress rehearsal today that made me feel very confident about the whole look. Phew!
So tell me—does anyone else operate like this? Or am I the only one living in a permanent episode of being in frazzled fashion state until everything falls into place?
PS Irony of “the dress” for the wedding is that after ordering 3 dresses online and buying one in person, I ended up finding a dress I wore to a wedding in Montreal at least 14 years ago (in one of the many boxes we have stored in a closet), put it on,it fit like a glove and I think I am actually going to wear it! Good thing, though I ordered those shoes:)
__________________________________________________________
And that’s whats on my mind this Thursday. Will be so curious to see if anyone can relate. Thanks for stopping in, wishing you a wonderful evening! Until next time…
That would make me crazy! Haha!
I am a planner- I like to have what I’m wearing ready in advance with back up outfit
The older I become I shop for clothes well in advance partly because they don’t always fit as I’d like on an “older” body !
Some people do better under pressure. It could be you know you have to make a decision and get it done last minute, so your brain tells you “no more hesitating” – and it gets done! (Does that make sense)? Like you subconsciously know this is it, time to get ‘it’ done and/or make a decision, no more fiddle/faddle lol. I tend to do this myself.
I am a planner of wardrobes because I traveled in my work for 22 years and didn’t have the luxury of time “to scramble” when I was home.
In reading your description of how you operate … You obviously procrastinate because you are either an emotional dresser.. “I want to see how I feel the day before the event and then I’ll choose” … or like so many women of our generation we think ; “I might be able to lose 5-7 pounds by then and fit into that terrific dress I wore 14 years ago” 🙂 Good on you! That’s my target by the end of the yer… and I am well on my way… to leaving behind far more than 5-7 pounds!
Oh my gosh….I could’nt do that…..I would drive myself and my husband crazy. You must handle stress well…..
I do not do what you describe; I maybe do not see the “stakes” as that high. My guess is you could have worn any number of beautiful dresses in your closet and looked great/nobody would have gone home saying,”what was Tina thinking with that dress?” Ha! I tend to believe we should all relax more with our clothes, and wear what we want and feel good in. I personally wouldn’t wear brand new shoes to an event like that, because if they deliver blisters or other ‘new shoe’ problems, then you’re stuck in pain or whatever not-good alternative presents itself. I want to both enjoy myself and be comfortable.
Also, I wonder if the frenzy around outfit/accessories is part of the whole experience for you? Like getting everything just right in terms of presentation or whatever is part of the thrill of a big event? just a thought…..
oh my goodness, I can so relate. I’m a retired florist and for more years than I care to number I lived with the panic induced by a product that was perishable and could only be ordered and designed a few days before important and special events. The frenzy and chaos were incredible. I lived on adrenaline and caffeine in the days before an event and slept only when it was done. Then…. my youngest son was getting married and asked me to do the florals and event design. I was honored and worked to make it my best production ever. I forgot one thing….. as the mother of the groom I needed a beautiful gown as well as all the accessories and shoes. Thank goodness for a local boutique owner who took me under her wing and made sure ked fabulous and felt confident and perfectly styled
You had me laughing. I am somewhat like you. I do tend to wait until the last minute. I have a feeling you have a closet full of beautiful things so you know worst case scenario you have some great backups. That is the case with me, I LOVE clothes and fashion and have a closet o prove it. Turned my sons old bedroom into my dream closet. So even though I like to go through the process of planning out outfits from dresses to jewelry to shoes, etc…and often times might want to buy something new to change things up, I tend to do it late because I guess I know worst case- I have beautiful back up choices. That’s my educated guess. And clearly from the few pictures I have seen of you, you have great style so I bet you have many beautiful things to choose from. Hope your shoes turn up and hope your events are/were lots of fun! Love these posts too.
That is me to a “T”! Not sure why I do it to myself except and do feel I get more done when my blood pressure is maxed out. 😩
You are like me, I do well under pressure and in fact, might even do my “best work” under pressure! I have always been that way, ever since way back to high school, cramming then onto college and graduate school. I thrived on the surge of adrenaline I would get from waiting till last. minute. Only thing I do ahead of time (like you) is pack days in advance as I want to be covered and not have to worry about going out in a foreign country to buy something i may have forgotten. You are probably type A as well. The point is it sounds like it always works out!
So – in reality – you do “impromptu” dressing – not entertaining/party throwing – LOL
I work best under pressure but don’t like to. Because of working under pressure I’m totally exhausted and don’t eat until next day and can’t sleep at night. I have high anxiety and it’s NOT good! I’ve been told by drs and cardiologist I’m asking for a heart attack or stroke. Drs say your body has to vent from pressure…..well my body did and I almost died! I’m saying this to try to help you and not ruin your health. My life is different now.
Your escapades on doing things last minute would drive me crazy lol lol I am one of those really bad Type AAA’s that always do things way in advance. My organized mind is vastly over organized lol lol But it does seem to work well for you so whatever!!!!! Different strokes for different f0lks lol I do know whatever you do it turns out beautifully!!!!1
Being home to sort out something is different from traveling, Having options in our closets is huge and actually fun to go through different outfits.
Just enjoy however things come together, It isn’t a reflection of anything.
We are so lucky to be able to create a look for any occasion and just embrace how fabulous it all comes together!
Clothing seems to be an afterthought when I have been putting together a party. Last minute I have a meltdown because I’m thinking I can’t wear that outfit. I think didn’t wear that the last time most of us were together. So off I go shopping for a new attire. I can certainly relate to your last minute shopping.
You gave me a good laugh at your spray painting the flower story- brilliant! I have a lot of formal clothes (used to do a lot of entertaining 2-4 times a week with my husbands law firm) so I. know I always have fallbacks. But every time I dress up, I do often like to add something “new”. Could be a pair of shoes or maybe a piece of jewelry or bag.
However I now almost always order everything online because the stores are so poorly stocked. I have been known to put things off to the end as well, I think mostly because I. know if all else fails, I definitely have something in my closet that will more than make do. So yes, relatable in many ways! Enjoy your events!
If I have something and I love it and know I really want to wear it, then I can plan in advance and leave it at that. (Now making sure it is pressed or steamed….I may wait some on that.) On the other hand, if I do not feel confident about what I have on hand, I tend to either shop early or fret like anything and delay. This is not good for me because I tend to settle and not like what I find. What I have learned is that I now have two or three dress styles I really like and feel good in. That narrows my search considerably and allows me to search quickly. I can leave trends and unflattering styles behind. I tend to have fun with shoes and handbags.
Nancy B makes the most important observation. I do the same thing and was told what I am really doing is drag racing my heart. All that intense stress is really hard on your body.
I used to run large galas with A list attendees Everything had to run perfectly – no room for any issues.
If there were they were handled so no one ever knew. The toll each event took was total exhaustion and I would physically collapse in the days following. While exciting and millions of dollars raised – it was a high price to pay.
As we age, we gain wisdom
Not everything matters as much as we think is does. Your health is so much more important.
In the next to last photo, what a pretty display. But the un-ironed pretty napkins ruined it for me! Am I the only one?
I plan weeks ahead of time, I try on every possibility WITH shoes, and I like to have nailed down at least 2 complete outfits so I have a choice when the time comes.
I have also ordered new stuff if I am not completely happy with what I already have. I don’t do well with last minute gambles or time pressures.
As for important longer travel (3 wks in Italy) I start at least a month in advance. I have a large plastic bin labeled “Italy” and put in everything I think would be useful to have. Then when I actually pack, I may edit and leave something behind but I won’t be scrambling. Not 100% effective but it puts my mind at ease. Unfortunately, my husband is a complete opposite so we pack our own things and seldom “comingle”.
Interesting concept about fashion! Not me at all! I plan months in advance with an additional option 2 as a backup. Being in the New England area you never know how the weather may turn. I usually have one dress with sleeves and one without.
If by chance I come upon a party dress that fits and looks good I buy it in anticipation that an event will pop up. I am lucky enough to have an everyday closet and a dress up closet. Sometimes I go and take a look in there and surprise myself!
Enjoy your event. I’m sure you will be stunning.
I am definitely a planner….Especially if we are going somewhere via plane and I have to pack everything. But I do have some standards that I tend to pull for the local “dressed up more than usual” events.
I do rely on my rolling rack to prep for travel and can easily add what I need as it crosses my mind.
I LOVE these discussion topics of late…please keep it up…my home is well decorated & has plenty of seasonal decor…so love the opportunity to comment with like minded readers. Your description is so ‘on-point’ for me…especially when it comes to in-home events or travel. Super organized…if the departure or event date was moved up closer, I’d be ready……but with regard to having to attend a ‘one-off’ event…be it a wedding, fund raiser, dinner…I used to be like you…but my reasoning was….I never knew what size I may be as my weight fluctuated by some 30 pounds…did I ‘enjoy’ (read over-eat) summer too much, did I get back to a workout routine or did something totally frustrate me that I consoled myself with comfort food or did I get my anger out by detail cleaning….So I could never pick out one-off clothing in advance….I Had to be last minute….now, fast forward 20 years post gainfully employed working…and my wardrobe has slowly become so perfect that you could text me that King Charles had a vacant seat for dinner and I’d have the proper attire. I have time to exercise everyday, no emergency communications from my kids needing this or that, and we eat our largest meal around 1-1:30, salads/soups for dinner….so much healthier that I’ve been maintaining my weight w/in 5-7 pounds. I think that part of the last minute ensemble choice also has to do with comfort…especially pre/post menopausal…..and thank heavens your joining what the younger set has been doing for many years….we ordered about 10 different sneaker for each kid to see what they wanted and returned the rest….with a usual 90 day return window, we always ordered early and held on to them to see which one’s they really wanted once school started. Crazy system but totally doable…now you can even get things w/in hours…Thanks for your post! Hope you enjoy the event!
And I thought I was the only one who scrambled at the last minute!!!!